~ In Honor of Stupid People ~
case you needed further proof that the human race
is doomed through stupidity,
here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods!
a Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair...)
a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner!
No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(what's this? the shoplifter special?)
a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(ahem... "just" a suggestion..?)
Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom!):
"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late for that, huh?!!)
Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time?)
Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(sure - we could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents)
( if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts...)
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and... I'm taking this because???....)
On many brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious...)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
a child's Superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere....?)
to Jackie for this one!!!
Girl - you had me in tears after reading it...